From Poem to Screen

Whose woods these are I think I know,

His house is in the village though; 

He will not see me stopping here 

To watch his woods fill up with snow. 

My little horse must think it queer 

To stop without a farmhouse near 

Between the woods and frozen lake 

The darkest evening of the year. 

He gives his harness bells a shake 

To ask if there is some mistake. 

The only other sound's the sweep 

Of easy wind and downy flake. 

The woods are lovely, dark and deep. 

But I have promises to keep, 

And miles to go before I sleep, 

And miles to go before I sleep. 

 

    “Cecil, who’s on line two? Bob Frost?” 

    “Bobby, how’s it hanging, baby? How’s Vermont? Sap still rising?” 

“Oh, mending walls, eh? Make sure you get a good contractor. This guy Sophie got on the guest house, he’s a goneph. I swear, I’m pouring money down a rat hole.

*

 "So what have you got for me, baby? A new poem? Pitch me! Two ears, no waiting.” “Stopping in the Woods on a Snowy Evening? Great title. Says it all. Three teen-age couples, cabin in the woods, axe-murderer, chop, chop, chop, big box office, I can smell the money, these kids can’ get enough of the crap!

*

 “No – no axe-murderer? Sex frolic? No teen-agers? Guy stops in the woods, woods fill up with snow. So his car breaks down, what, he’s pitted against nature, there’s wolves, maybe a bear, maybe Dick and Perry, or it’s Deliverance New England style?

*

    “No car. He’s got a little horse. You mean he’s – no, a real horse. Okay, yeah, I’m still with you, Bob. What’s that about the horse?” “The horse thinks he’s queer for stopping. 

*

    “Have you shopped this to A24 at all?” “No, no, I’m just not sure how we play that beat, the – oh, he gives his harness bells a shake. Yeah, a nice touch. I’m sure Tom Hanks could pull it off. He was golden with that soccer ball.”

*

    “Bob, is there a girl, maybe back in the city, I’m thinking a Selina Gomez type, she and Hanks have had a fight, hot Latin temper, Hanks bangs out the door headed for the woods in the snow, now she’s worrying like crazy, she calls the cops, they send out maybe Javier Bardem or Christoph Walz---

*

      “The woods are lovely, dark and deep … no, that’s nice. I know Chris Nolan is looking for another project before he starts Oppenheimer II. You might want someone with indy cred.

*

      “Promises to keep? Hey, nobody’s breaking any promises. You’re signed for a three-poem deal, baby. I’m just saying, I think the studios are looking more for something like Fire and Ice. That was huge for us last summer.

*

      “Miles to go? Tell me about it. I’m up to my neck every day. You should see what Walt Whitman sent us. Way over budget, two hours too long, the guy’s got final cut, there’s no talking to these prima donnas.

*

      “If you’re having any problems that way, listen, my doctor put me on this new shit, I’m sleeping like a baby now. Yeah, I wake up every three hours and cry. No, really, I got extra, don’t mention it, it’s in the mail.

*

     “Bobby, Bobby, why don’t you put something together, a treatment, have your people send it over to us, you know we want to see it. Who have we got left who knows how to bring in a poem on time, with end-stopped rhymes? Think about the Selina angle, that’s all I’m asking. Talk to you soon, Bobby.

*

      “Who’s on one, Cecil? Sylvia Plath? I am so not ready for that psycho-drama. Tell her I’m in a meeting, I’ll call her back as soon as I get out. And get me Rob Browning on the line. I need a re-write on this piece of shit dramatic monologue Michael Bay is hot for.”